4 Happiness Factors

October 31, 2013

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I'm Deb- CEO, worldwide executive coach, mentor, consultant and speaker. I'm here to help you take your leadership and impact to the next level!

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The Town Mouse

This is what happens when an S /I -wired person escapes the cubicle! (Story below)


Have you ever felt stuck or discouraged in your life or work? Does it feel like you’ve grown to a certain point and then suddenly everything has come to a screeching halt? Are you feeling a little “down” but can’t put your finger on the cause?


Well, given that health care is taking center stage these days, let’s address this issue in those terms.


Consider this your checkup for the 4 Happiness Factors.


1. Inside


Symptoms:  Lack of desire. Fatigue. Boredom. 

These are indicators that either (a) you are spending too much time outside your strengths zone, or (b) you are spending too much time within your strengths zone.


Remedy:  Do the opposite.
Oddly enough, the remedy for either of these scenarios is the same: Do the opposite. If you are operating outside your strengths zone, find a way to begin working in it.  If you don’t know what your strengths zone is, I highly encourage you to take a DISC profile. Many of my clients have used this tool to find satisfying work – and accompanying success – for the first time in their lives.


If you know your strengths and are working in them, chances are your service or product will be in high demand – which is great. You enjoy what you are doing so much that you go at it with great intensity. The problem with that is that every once in a while, you have to remind yourself to take a break. In fact, I recommend you go spend some time with someone who is opposite of you. It will help to recharge your battery. If you are C-wired and spending a long period at the end of each month with your head buried in spreadsheets, plan to take a break right after that and spend some time with friends who hate spreadsheets. Why? Because they will NOT talk about spreadsheets! It will help you take your mind off work. Doing the opposite and spending time with those who are opposite from us brings us back to balance.


2. Outside


Symptoms:  Anger. Anxiety. Feeling like something doesn’t fit.
You used to love your job, but you’ve had a change in management, and now you just don’t enjoy it. You are an I-wired person and you just moved into a house with beige walls…or maybe you’re an S-wired person and you moved into a house with hot pink and lime green walls. These are environmental issues.


Remedy:  Change or Accept.
So how do you fix these environmental issues? Well, for one thing, the I- and S-wired folks in the above case could simply switch houses!  If your environmental situation is more about people than painting walls, there are things you can do. You can either change to a better workplace or accept the personalities where you are and learn to communicate with them in ways they understand.  The DISC assessment has a great section on creating your best environment.


Recently, I heard delightful news about one of my students from a couple of years ago. While taking the Strengths course, Stacy learned she was S/I wired. Though she was a good administrative assistant, being trapped in a cubicle was such a bad fit for her I-wiring.  Armed with this insight, she sought a more suitable work environment. I am excited to report that today she is the owner of The Town Mouse, a trendy shop north of Kansas City that allows her to use her organizing and arranging skills combined with her wonderful hospitality skills on a daily basis. She is also a community manager at the local high school and is active in real estate. She changed her environment and now loves her work.


3. Top Side


Symptoms:  Lack of hope. Feelings of despair and disappointment.
Let’s face it, sometimes we find ourselves feeling hopeless. Life can be overwhelming. If you’re one of those who just received an insurance cancellation notice or are finding that you’re going to have two to six times your normal premium, you might be feeling a sense of despair. If you’ve lost your job and are not finding a new one, you will definitely feel despair. This is normal. But what can you do?


Remedy:  Look up. Press on. Get help.
As hard as it is, we have to press on. We have to acknowledge the negatives, but decide to focus on the positives.  Dr. Marlene Evans called this “flip side thinking”. (You DO remember the old days when you had to flip records, right?) And she lived it as she battled cancer for over twenty years and was a blessing to thousands. Look for opportunities within the problems, and reach out to those who are on topside to help pull you up.



4. Underside


Symptoms:  Insecurity. Lack of trust.
You have a gnawing feeling that you are never good enough. You have been hurt and therefore find it very hard to trust. You find measured doses of success…and then sabotage your success by listening to the voices that say you don’t deserve to succeed.


Remedy:  Have a Strong Foundation
Understand that you are created with gifts that are unique to you. And you DO have what you need to do what you need to do. This is your inner foundation. In a world of change, having strong faith, values, and principles will provide a strong outer foundation.  Decide not to be happy “under the circumstances” but happy based on a strong foundation.