Let’s Be Real

August 19, 2014

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I'm Deb- CEO, worldwide executive coach, mentor, consultant and speaker. I'm here to help you take your leadership and impact to the next level!

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I have some pretty smart friends who will be sharing a slice of their leadership message on my blog. This week it is my friend Missy Day. Time to get real with Missy’s post! – Deb


 child exec

“Let’s Be Real”

It’s about to get real, up in here…


I’m reminded of a song that was popular in my house growing up that said, “I Gotta Be Me”. (I know, showing my age). And I use to think, who else would someone be? Little did I realize how true that lyric really is.


I know in my life I have gone through many stages of wanting to be like someone else. Growing up in Southern California I wanted the long blonde hair, blue eyes and the dark tan. But my Scottish heritage dictated something else. I dreamed of being on a stage singing in a rock band like Pat Benatar, well let’s just say unless the audience was tone deaf that wasn’t an option either.


Then one day in high school my Psychology teacher said something to me that changed the direction of my life. He said, “Missy, let’s get real about who you are. You’ve been taking my class for three years now, figure out if this is your passion and do something with your knowledge.” I thought about that for several days wondering what he was talking about! At 16 who really thinks about what their passion is.


The summer before my senior year I made the decision to get my MSW, become a Social Worker and follow my passion for wanting to help others. I finally got what he was saying, figure out who you are, what you love doing and be real!


Now let’s fast forward 25 years where I find myself leading a team of 35 people in the corporate world and I’m the one asking the questions, “What are your strengths, what’s your passion, are you being real?”


For me as a leader, those are the important questions in the workplace and in life. I wanted a team who felt empowered, knew what their role was on the team, come to work on fire with passion because they were operating in their strengths and being real! That’s a team that can turn a company upside down. I use to tell people on my team, be who you are at all times and they thanked me for that. How often in life and in this society are we encouraged to be something we aren’t? I wanted them to stop comparing themselves to other team members and focus on being their personal best.


“The List”


Because it’s been a LONG time since I was in high school, I still need that check sometimes to ensure I’m being real. I have a list of questions I ask myself whenever I’m thinking of embarking on something new.


  1. Is this in my strength zone?
  2. Is this something I am passionate about?
  3. Is this something that will benefit others?
  4. Will this reflect who I am as a person?
  5. Am I being real?


That list has enabled me to weed out a lot of things that I really had no business being a part of.


I would encourage you to never settle for less than who you are. We are all unique with special gifts and talents. Find your passion, operate in your strengths and BE REAL!





MDayPic-2Missy Day has a passion for people that was realized at an early age. She chose Social Work as her first career right out of college. She soon realized she had a gift in assisting others find their purpose, vision and goals which eventually leads to their passion.

Missy found her way into Leadership roles with financial institutions purely by accident, and quickly found out she felt right at home. She has taken her 20 years of leadership experience in the Corporate World, to businesses and individuals who want to take themselves and their team to the next level of success. She specializes in corporations who want to increase their productivity, improve their processes and turn their employees into team members.

Her experience has been if you build relationships with your team, they will trust you and follow wherever you lead. That philosophy combined with fun in the workplace, will take your team to a level you never thought possible. As John Maxwell says, “They don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” Learn more about Missy at: www.passion4success.net





  1. Dan Miller says:

    Missy – great checklist. One of the benefits of getting a little older is being clearer about the response to each of those questions. I think when we’re 16 it’s difficult to know – welcome the value of maturity!

    • Deb Ingino says:

      Dan great point! Yet another reason I’m excited to speed towards 60…it’s all about clarity of purpose and action.

      • Missy says:

        Thank you Dan! The list has remained the same over the years but it’s interesting how the answers have changed as I age. Although I value maturity and not being 16 anymore,, I’m not so sure I want to “speed” to 60. Let’s just have clarity and remain 55.

  2. sabdalian says:

    Missy, I enjoyed reading this post. I feel especially as a woman we have a hard time being ok with who we really are. And our current culture doesn’t always push us toward being true to ourselves. Accepting yourself as who you are and loving others for who they are is huge. I love your checklist also and will definitely pass this post along to friends who could benefit. Great post Missy!

    • Deb Ingino says:

      Sandra such truth in your observation. So glad that there are strong successful women leaders like you pushing for us to be true to who we really are.

    • missy says:

      Thank you, Sandra! I completely agree with you. I hope the list helps your friends.

  3. Diana Bader says:

    Missy, great post! This is exactly what I try to instill in the kids I work with. I love the idea of a list, I’m going to have to borrow that.

  4. Very well done Missy! Not only does “being real” set you on a path to being the best version of yourself, it’s just plain likable. Love the questions.